Mum, I miss you very much. This morning, we brought father to NCC for CT Scan. I couldn’t control my tears when I was there, as just not too long ago I was with you in the same room, waiting for your turn to have the radiation sessions. I had to walk away from father and my sisters as I didn’t want them to see my tears. I fear visiting places flooded with lots of memories, like the shophouse, your bed and the sofa bed in the hall of 2nd brother’s house, it just hurts …
Mum, you are greatest mum, grandma and wife in the whole wide world! Though you have 9 children, you took great care of every single one of us, not showing any favouritism. When we were young, most of us did not do any housework while you had to cook, wash, clean, tend to grandma, help in father’s shop – you were like a superwoman! Like what brother-in-law said, you seemed to have a mini computer in your brain and knew everyone’s likes and dislikes. You knew all our favourite dishes and would cook for us - father, 9 of us plus our spouses, your 21 grandchildren, our 3 cousins from Malacca and even the employees of the shop. As I live near the shop, you would often phone me to go to the shop whenever you cooked my favourite dishes and you would specially reserve many pieces of yam for me in a separate bowl. Unfailingly, you would ring me every Saturday (when we have our weekly family affair, where 20-30 of us would gather at the shophouse) at about 6 pm, to ask when we were going over, and I would always say “yeah, we’re coming over soon ...” Sadly, I do not know your favourite dishes … I only know you love to play Bubbles on the Palm PDA which I bought from ebay for you (but you were so addicted to the game that I secretly removed the game from the PDA, but later put it back again), solve Sudoku, and you also love to play jackpot in Genting (1-cent kind); you said that before you were sick, even plain water tasted good, and when you were very sick and did not have much appetite, even a cup of instant hot Kopi-O could make your day!
Mum, even when you were very sick and feeling uncomfortable, you still thought of us, and constantly worried about us. You said that Lim Jeck was intelligent but he must not neglect making friends and should learn to speak more; and you also reminded me to get Lim Min (whom I told you I have the least worries, in her studies) and Lim Jeck to guide Lim Li in her school work …
Mum, most couples would squabble but I don’t remember you and father had ever quarreled. You had never laid hands on us, and you had never raised your voice before, to anyone. You seemed sad when you heard us having disputes/disagreements over your treatment options …
Mum, though you were gone, I think you are very blessed as all of us love you so much!! And, you are no longer suffering, and do not have to force yourself to take so many kinds of tablets (English medicine), herbs (Chinese medicine) and supplements …
Mum, if there is a next life, I am certain that I want you and father to be my parents again …
I miss you mum … so much … so much …
father's birthday celebration in 2007
father's birthday celebration in 2008
mum's birthday celebration in 2008
mum's favourite game which she played incessantly before she was diagnosed with breast cancer in January this year.
No comments:
Post a Comment